Monday, August 18, 2014
There is an old saying, “show me who you are with, and I will tell you who you are!”
It was recently announced that Governor John Kasich, a man who claims to be one who cares about the mentally ill, will share a stage with disgraced former football coach Jim Tressel, as he is installed as president of Youngstown State University. This is another example of the wealthy ethically failing upwards and being rewarded handsomely for acting as if the rules do not apply. Mr. Kasich’s appearance appears to endorse Tressel’s past lack of moral standard, and his personal contempt of the mentally ill.
Years ago, not long after Ohio State won the National championship, the first of numerous scandals involving Tressel at that school occurred. This consisted of possible academic fraud by several players, including the star, running back Maurice Clarret.
During a class, a young teaching assistant, Norma McGil, witnessed what she felt was preferential treatment of those players. She took this information to her superiors, who turned around and began to incite a modern day lynching of this girl. Since she did suffer from depression, it became open season on her from not only the ones on campus, but all of buckeye nation. Her suffering with a socially unacceptable disease made her an easy target, especially by the cowards in the school administration.
While the campus erupted with derogatory description’s attacking this women’s struggle with mental illness, statements such as crazy black bitch and referring to her as a mental freak were the norm. During this episode, Tressel stood in a silence, hoping that Clarret could play again. He never did!
The teaching assistant, after facing false and slanderous accusations, along with the many dehumanizing and ignorant characterizations, finally surrendered and left the school. Though Ohio State has since reached out to both Tressel and, once he served his time for a felony, Clarret, no evidence exists that they done the same for that teaching assistant. Efforts to get answer as to why from the schools media relations department have been met with silence.
However, to his credit, though Tressel stood in silence while this girl was being tarred and feathered, he did it with a valid driver’s license which made that behavior acceptable in the eyes of the Kasich followers. To them, it appears that was more important than the safety and well-being of a student.
Many of Tressel’s apologists immediately run to his defense when he is being held accountable. In a previous column, one women attacked my premise that he knew anything about what this girl endured or even reported. To answer, first, he was questioned by the NCAA about her allegations and he stood by his assertion that Clarret was an exemplary student athlete. Lastly, his ignorance to what happened to her is about as likely as the late Penn State football coach Joe Paterno’s claims that he knew nothing of the years of child molestation by his assistant coach, Jerry Sandusky. It is just beyond the realm of believability.
Another defender of Tressel’s attacked me for comparing his ethical lapses with those of Former President Richard Nixon. I was told that it was despicable for a comparison such as that and I owe him an apology. To that I agree, that was a disgusting analogy. Soon, I will be sending that deserved apology to the Nixon family.
In a conversation with Governor’s office, they insisted that this appearance was not about Jim Tressel, it was about Youngstown State. The spokeswomen insisted this was about a new President being installed. I asked that if a former leader of the Ku Klux Klan was being installed as President of an Ohio College if Mr. Kasich would give the same response. I was told they would not be dealing with hypotheticals.
Next his spokesperson delved into how Governor Kasich was a real friend of the mentally ill. Often, they point to his support of the expansion of the Medicaid program. His offices theatrics aside, his pillar was not about assisting those in need, but about saving money. This expansion was paid for by the Federal Government and this freed up state tax revenue. This can best be termed a shallow accomplishment and would have never occurred without federal intervention and a financial benefit to his backers.
. Mr. Kasich did have the opportunity to step up and truly put the mentally ill first as he has proclaimed in the past. However, he failed miserably and to use a football metaphor, he punted the problem into oblivion.
. In 2011, shortly after taking office, he killed the plans to build a new public mental health facility in Cleveland. This would have served the state’s largest group of homeless mentally ill, but the governor decided they could go to Summit County for help. What was ignored is that many of these family members live below the poverty level which makes travel nearly impossible. To this day, Cuyahoga County, with the states greatest need for public Health beds, has none to offer. That is inexcusable and is a major blemish on Governor Kasich’s record!
Now that he is safely ahead in the polls, Governor Kasich will sip champagne and feast on a taxpayer funded meal with the new President of Youngstown State University. He will gleefully make this trip to garner support for his re-election campaign, and find plenty of time to mingle with his financial backers, while taxpayers foot the bill.
One group that Kasich did not have time for, were the families of the poor in Cleveland who desperately needed that facility to provide treatment to their severely mentally ill loved ones. He did not have the time to explain his motivation for his belief that they had no real value. He refused overtures to explain this poor decision that he made involving those that are most vulnerable. They did not have champagne to offer him, nor an expensive meal, all they could do was try to convince him that the mentally ill are human beings, ones that developed an illness and need treatment. However, he did not have the time.
It has been said that describing the actions of these individuals as bigotry is being overly harsh and misguided. My answer is what do you call the persecution of a mentally ill girl who was doing her job and then was terrorized by the backers of the school’s football team, harmless hazing? When a Governor refuses to fund a much needed treatment facility that could save lives, do you compare him to Mother Teresa? In both cases, no, they should not be glossed over, they are what they are, hateful and filled with an abundance of discrimination.
Jim Tressel has made it well known that he looks forward to being part of academia and assisting the students. If his actions during that past scandal is any indication of what he plans, it has the potential for a tragic outcome. That Governor Kasich, would not be something one would want on their campaign literature. Or is it?
Tuesday, August 12, 2014
“I dream of angels, but I live with demons,” are simple words from an episode of “Law and Order, Special Victims Unit." This scripted line can easily be construed as a metaphor for those living within the confines of mental illness. It speaks volumes of the normalcy we all strive for, but often eludes those that suffer from a relentless disease. These disorders stand as a significant roadblock to ones desire to achieve ultimate happiness. This alternate path of life which is well-traveled, wears out its victim attempting to transverse the terrain, and once again, it claimed another victim.
The headline was short and direct, “Comedian Robin Williams dead of an apparent suicide!” Many similar titles were posted throughout the evening as the shock of this tragedy took the nation by storm. So many comments such as, a talented actor, a man who could make us all laugh, were some of the most-common themes. However, the caption was not an accurate depiction of what transpired.
An actual headline should have read, “Robin Williams, a man who did not wish to die, lost his battle with mental illness and addiction!” This heading flies into the conventional but false belief that people end their lives because they chose too. The real cause of his death, which mirror those of the nearly 40,000 Americans who do commit suicide annually, is the fierce and unrelenting emotional pain brought on by major depression. It is unlikely he had a desire to end his life. However, the question on the minds of his fans is simply why? The answers are not always clear, nor are they readily understood.
It is imperative to understand that those with healthy minds do not voluntarily end their lives. They would find the concept of self-murder an unwarranted ending, simply because they fail to see life through the prism of mental illness. Dr. Kay Redfield Jamison, Head of Psychiatry at John Hopkins Hospital, sums it up in her book,” Night Falls Fast," “Suicide will have seemed to its perpetrator the last and best of bad possibilities…” In essence, the afflicted ones feel they have run out of options.
Personally, I understand her reasoning. It was about 13 years ago that I nearly lost my personal battle with this dreaded disease Robin Williams, and I shared, bipolar disorder. I recall just dreaming and fighting the urge to put a gun to my head and pulling the trigger. While in a delusional state, I would hear voices encouraging me to end my life and reinforce that it was the only option left to end the many years of torturous pain. The suffering was so intense that I would just lay in bed and cry from its affects. Like most afflicted, all I wanted was the agony to finally end. Those thoughts manifested themselves in such a manner, that it led to eventual attempts to end my life. It was only dumb luck that I survived. As Dr. Jamison pointed out, because of clouded thinking, I could not envision an alternative, as up until then, treatment continuously failed.
Unless one experiences the symptoms, it is impossible to grasp the dark valleys of depression that many confront and lose hope that they can ever discover happiness. The afflicted suffers unendurable pain, loneliness, and with a desperate desire to find a way to end their suffering. Even those such as myself who recover, still live with a sense of foreboding that the symptoms may one-day return.
It is no secret that Robin Williams fought both bipolar disorder and drug addiction. This dual diagnosis is a difficult challenge to confront. They feed off one another. The drugs treat the symptoms, which exacerbates the need for them, which creates the individual’s desire for further self-medication. A full sixty percent of those with mental illness do develop a chemical dependency. His drug of choice was cocaine, but others use an assortment of illicit drugs and/or alcohol. It is worth adding that 20% of all people who develop bipolar disorder do eventually kill themselves.
Robin Williams did indeed typify the concept of the “tears of a clown," smile on the outside and crying on the inside. While he was performing for millions of fans and bringing them entertainment and laughter, it is likely that he was sobbing on the inside. The public only witnessed his manic side, his high voltage personality, but not the subsidiary of pain from the inevitable depression that follows. That is a common trait of those stricken, as many develop the ability to hide their true emotions.
As with other similar deaths, a great deal of empathy is expressed but it also brings out those with ignorance of what the victims confront. One simple cliché always finds its way into the conversation. It is “Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem!” To clear up this misconception; depression is not a problem, it is a relentless and deadly disease that attacks indiscriminately and left untreated, or is treatment resistant, does destroy its targets!!
One comment that stood out with its vile and vicious stupidity was “to kill oneself is very selfish…it is a coward’s way out…” Those that battle mental illness are not cowards, quite the contrary, they fight a valiant battle daily not only with the illness, but against ignorance of those who have not taken the time to understand its symptomology. Robin Williams was no coward; he bravely fought a lifetime battle, to which he finally succumbed. His courageous openness about his struggle unblocked the door for others to not be ashamed and to also seek treatment. No doubt, his response to his challenge has saved countless lives!
To better illustrate how many of those who suffer feel, some individuals go to bed with the irrational fear that they will never wake up. Those who are in the throes of a deep depression go to bed with the fear that they “will” wake up and have to face another day of suffering. It is not a pleasant existence, and it is one that millions of Americans face daily.
As a way to honor his memory, take the time to understand these afflictions. Most importantly, be aware of the warning signs of potential suicides. Many at risk feel a sense of detachment from family and friends, they have out of character mood swings, or they express a desire to end their lives. This person is not engaging in drama; it is often a cry for help. Respond with empathy, not pity. Most importantly, never define a person by their illness, the symptoms are an involuntary reaction.
Finally, next time the Indians sell-out Progressive field, remember that is the about the number of people who commit suicide in this country every year. Look around and examine the faces of those in attendance, because they are the doppelgängers of the real victims. The mentally ill are average citizens trying to get through life struggles and at the same time, have the added burden of the demons of a socially unacceptable disease. Most seek nothing more than understanding and acceptance.
With the death of Robin Williams, I feel as if I lost a teammate. His apparent suicide has left his fans devastated and feeling very alone. No, I am not an actor, nor have I even met this great and talented entertainer. He and I shared a camaraderie of being afflicted with mental illness, specifically, bipolar disorder. For me, his death opened the doors of a past wrought with pain which still haunt me. This created a strong sense of compassion for him as I am acutely familiar with the desperation he felt that proceeded his fatal act. No one has a right to judge him by this method of death, only honor his life and remember the entertainment he brought us all.
Rest in Peace Robin Williams, you have left your demons behind!
Wednesday, May 28, 2014
Just this past weekend, we Americans honored the true heroes of this great nation, the veterans that served and some who died fighting for freedoms that we tend to take for granted. Others classified as hero’s come in many shapes and sizes, such as first responders and some ordinary citizens who do extraordinary acts. They exemplify true heroism.
Sadly, society has, at times, convoluted the title hero. We tend to worship self-serving individuals, such as athletes and honor shallow gallantry. With that as a backdrop, we are treated to the presence of one of Ohio’s true false idols, former Ohio State running back, Maurice Clarett.
It was recently announced that on Thursday, May 29th, the local independent baseball team, the Lake Erie Crushers advertised the appearance of Clarett at that night’s game. No truth to the rumor that this was to be called “narcissism night at the ballpark”, but this promotion still demands exploration.
When contacted, the spokesman for the Crushers said there were several reasons for this invitation. First, it is the halfway point from last season to this year’s matchup with Michigan. Secondly, it was pointed out that, in the United States, everyone deserves a second chance. He went on to elaborate that the ESPN 30 on 30 segment also influenced their decision to invite him. He also expressed pride in how Clarett battled and overcame his mental illness.
On the first point, no one can argue. Michigan and Ohio State is a large rivalry and gets national media attention. I feel the same way as a Clemson Tigers fan, as on that same November night, they play their rival South Carolina. I admit to being a dedicated College Football fan!
Next was the claim that everyone deserves a second chance, to which I agree. As a mental health advocate and as one who suffered many indignities because of my own condition, I witness remarkably few receiving the opportunity to reestablish themselves. However, with second chances, Clarett has had more lives than a cat and has been the benefactor of numerous opportunities. Additionally, it would not be a stretch to believe that the boosters of “Buckeye Nation” have taken exceptional care of him.
Next, if they seek to exploit the 30 on 30 show featuring the scandal ridden Jim Tressel and Clarret, they are free to do just that. In that episode, I noticed little was made about the allegations of academic fraud, or the list of scandals that have plagued Tressel’s career. However, like most wealthy people, he failed upward by being named President of Youngstown State University.
Finally, we reach the crux of the remaking of Clarett. He claims he suffers from mental illness, and that has been the cause of all his maladaptive behavior. It is here that I take issue with his being both praised and worshipped by others, such as the Lake Erie Crushers for his personal battle. Speaking as both an advocate, and as one who has struggled with mental illness, I have serious doubts of his being sincere in this crusade.
It is here that the hypocrisy of Clarett and his gullible follower’s adulation of his recovery from mental illness warrants careful scrutiny,
Back in 2003, when the arrogance of this young man was first making its mark, he allegedly walked out of a class while taking a test. Those actions, reported by a teaching assistant, Norma McGil, should have resulted in a failed grade, which would have made him ineligible for the important game with Michigan, eventually won by Ohio State propelling them to a National Title. Instead, he was later permitted to take an oral exam to pass the class. Here again, preferential treatment and a second chance for Clarett.
It was then that this teaching assistant was to pay a high price for properly doing her job. Rather than be concerned with the behavior of Clarett, the school and its arrogant leaders turned their attention on this teaching assistant. Specifically, they went after her Achilles heel, her own battle with the same mental illness that Clarett claims to be suffering, major depression. The members of Buckeye Nation attacked her with a ferociousness of a pack of rabid dogs and dragged her through the mud. Her boss even got into the act. Professor Kenneth Goings was quoted as saying he had trouble believing her because of her illness. However, he never witnessed any odd behavior on her part. When pressed, he admitted he based his judgment on hearing rumors, not any logical reasoning. It must be added that this man, Goings, is a PHD.
Ironically, ESPN, which produced the 30 on 30 show featuring Clarett, once did a story on this teaching assistant. In this article, they placed her in a “whistleblower’s purgatory.” Miss McGil went on to describe that because of losing her job at Ohio State over this episode; “I’ve been rendered homeless, slept in cars, slept on the ground.” All because she told the truth about Clarett and was honest in her position. In time, the stress of this episode exacerbated her illness, and she herself has been in and out of trouble for years, which ended her dream of becoming a teacher. However, no one associated with Ohio State has attempted to assist her with a “second chance”.
It is in this setting that the duplicity of Ohio State and the credulous masses, such as those from the Lake Erie Crushers, fail to see the different way they viewed Norma McGil’s struggle with mental illness vs Clarett’s.
As Maurice travels the state on his quest to rehabilitate his image, many heap praise on him. One woman told me that she was proud of how he is battling his demons. At Ohio State he was given a standing ovation and treated as royalty. Not long ago, he spoke to the National Alliance on Mental illness (NAMI) of Ohio. He was given a standing ovation and praised for his courage. When questioned, one person described him as a “neat guy!”
Now contrast that with the treatment of the teaching assistant. She was harassed, and the subject of a verbal lynch mob. On campus and on the local radio station, she was known as “Norma the Mental freak!” Another classy comment from the Buckeye faithful was “get the crazy black bitch off campus!” These degenerates were spurred on by the silence of those protecting Clarett, who, as mentioned earlier, suffered from the same condition.
With the reference to Memorial Day, on a side note, I am quite certain that Clarett can receive the best treatment for any condition that money can buy. The same cannot be said of our military veterans whose desire for treatment for conditions such as post-traumatic stress syndrome, PTSD, can languish for months.
The final question I asked the spokesperson from the Crushers was simply” What about Norma McGil?” His response was the same as I receive from almost everyone I ask. He said, who is Norma McGil? No one remembers the victim of this scandal, only the perpetrators, Tressel and Clarett, and many continue to find ways to promote them both, and demonize the teaching assistant.
The Crushers did offer me the opportunity to speak with Clarett, and I would have taken them up on the offer if I did not have to work. However, it is important to point out that I have tried for many years to talk about these issues with both he and Tressel and have been met with the famous, click of the receiver or being told that “they would get back to me.” They never did return my call. However, if I did converse with him, I would ask about Norma McGil and his preferential treatment. I would explore that if his claims of being remorseful are accurate, has he ever reached out to her and if he asked Buckeye nation to assist her as a victim. I would hope he will one day answer honestly, but that remains to be seen.
Finally, as one who has fought the demons of mental illness, of suicidal ideation, I applaud all those who bravely confront their personal demons. Few recognized that this is a lifetime sentence of treatment. However, I am disgusted by this invitation and take it as a personal insult for those who do indeed suffer. If the Lake Erie Crushers wish to understand the harm these illnesses can do to those who deserve help, I can introduce them to hundreds of more deserving of praise and adulation than Clarett. However none of them can score touchdowns, nor are filled with self-promotion like he has displayed. They just want to be normal happy lives, like everyone aspires to do!